I had a dream about my (former) best friend last night. I put the word "former" in parenthesis because I am still trying to accept the fact that we are not in contact anymore and we are no longer friends...much less best friends. However, I still love and care for her so much and it still hurts that I haven't heard a word from her for 4 years!
In my dream, I saw her at a party for someone in her family. I don't remember who. It was just like old times. I mean, we talked and laughed and shared stories about our families. Also, she finally got to meet Austin.
This person was matron-of-honor in my wedding. I thought we would be best friends the rest of our lives. I loved her son and daughter like they were my own. They stayed at my house. I took them places and gave them tons of hugs and kisses. I miss them more than words can say...even more now that I have my own son because I wish they could have a friendship with Austin...even though they are about 10 years older than him.
Things went very wrong in our friendship and many cruel and hurtful things were said and I shouldn't feel bad because I have a group of such amazing friends who would do anything for me, but the one thing that I miss about Michelle is that she could make me LAUGH harder than anyone ever has in my entire life...even Rick.
I am counting my blessings today and I am so thankful I have Rick and Austin, but having a husband is still different than having a best friend...even though Rick really is my best friend. I know men don't understand the kinds of friendships women have. They are different than the friendships men have. It's hard to explain to a husband why you miss your best friend so much.
So, today I just want to pray for Michelle and her family and hope that they are doing well because I still love them and wish them the best and maybe one day if it is in God's plan we will connect again. Maybe when her kids are driving age in a couple years they will drive over and pay me a visit...that would be cool!
